How Did They Ever Live
Hello, all you Comic Eye fans!!! Today, we'll talk about
something on a sillier note simply called: How did they
ever live?
Superman:
This guy was pathetic. What a loser!! He fought crime for 50
years and Lois Lane never caught on to the fact that Clark Kent
was Superman. Lois was probably a natural blonde. He always did
what he thought was right, and never cheated on anything. I'll
bet Lana would disagree with that, though.
Quasar:
This guy had a home-made costume, a headband for a mask, and a
pair of magical bracelets. How masculine. He was named
"defender of the universe", until every villain in the book
kicked his butt. He's even worse off than Superman, due to the
fact that he was an Avenger.
Medusa:
This member of the Inhumans was blessed with the power of living
hair. Wow. What a power. It may just be me, but I don't think
that her hair could help her in a fight. "Leave me alone!!
That's it, get 'em hair!!!" You know I'm scared.
Rogue:
This chick can't even touch anyone! Why should I even bother
talking about her then.
Scarlet Witch:
She used to fight the X-Men, now she's fighting with the Avengers
and Force Works. Make up your mind, sister!!! Her hex power has
been failing, and she can't fight worth beans!! I bet I could
take her. Bring her on!!!
Thunderstrike:
This Thor reject has had nothing but bad luck since he got here.
In one of his first battles, the Absorbing Man kicked his clock
from here 'till Friday, and you wonder why he's on here. His
mace can't do squat, and all the other Thors out there boss him
around. What a pansy!! He's got the powers of an Asgardian God,
but the only problem is, he's afraid to use them. Loser.
Instead of Puzzling Thoughts for Today, I'm presenting a new
series called:
Famous Loser Superhero
Quotes:
1. "Pl--please, sir--I don't w-want to die!" -
Some little girl protected by Professor X.
2. "Sides--all the big guys think I'm good for is pizza
pickup." - Speedball.
3. "N-now wh-what?" - The Scarecrow with a
girl.
4. "What's your next move, Wolvie?" - Rogue.
This is about it for today, so I guess I'll see you later.
Issue #4 - Written by Jason Moore
Copyright1996, Old Dominion X Press
Old Dominion X Press
Webmaster
On Line: 16-Mar-96
Revised: 18-Aug-96
